Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
