:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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