you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize