i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
