Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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