Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".

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(319): View more from Iowa

Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.

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(512): View more from Texas

We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.

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(917): View more from New York City

He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.

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(330): View more from Ohio

If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?

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(586): View more from Michigan

I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.

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(931): View more from Tennessee

Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?

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