I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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