That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize