sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
