Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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