I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
