Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Randomize
