3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I don't think brook has ever known best
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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