belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
