You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Quick, to the slutcave!
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Holy shit dude........stairs
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
