I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
