Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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