You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
