Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
