We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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