We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
