just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
