if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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