Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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