afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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