Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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