Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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