nut hugger
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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