I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
