I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
