So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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