I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize