I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
