yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
