so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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