Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
