ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
