I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
