Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
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