So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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