I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Everclear isn't food dammit
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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