How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
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