If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
