This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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