if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
My ATM looks so different sober.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
