she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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