Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
