I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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