Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i think i have two assholes
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
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