this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
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